I am a white male born in Belgium from Belgium parents. Born in 16 december 1971 (Catholic time frame). No spiritual background.
From at least 2006 I have been meditating. I write this now in 2021. So that makes 15 years of meditation so far at least.
Discovering my holistic nature is a work in progress. So is this text.
The first time was by accident. In the spring of 2010. It was when the volcano https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2010_eruptions_of_Eyjafjallaj%C3%B6kull erupted.
I have since learned I am connected to Iceland, Spain and the Himalayas. I have several animal totems that are connected, live in, various places on earth.
Discovering my wolf totem : I was inspired to go an a pilgrims journey to Santiago de Compostela. I was trouble over the logistics and over it’s connection to the Catholic church. After some time I had vision which myself and a wolf giving each other a hug which ended the anguish. That wolf is a animal totem of mine located in my scalp, behind to the left. That wolf is connected to Pyrenees mountain range
To the right of that wolf I have a raven totem. I have a crow in front of the wolf. Both the crow and raven are connected with Ural Mountain range.
Because of meditation on nature in Rivierenhof park in Antwerp and such a oak tree totem grew spiritually at the back of my scalp in the center there between the wolf and the raven there.
self
I learned so far that I have not just a biological background but also a separate spiritual background .
And I have a foreground.
I have not just a self that is in the foreground and is conditioned by my upbringing and personality
I also have dormant self in the background. To become an adult I have to rise that dormant self.
self : psyche, mind and soul :
self : self and my totems
The totems that I have are not me. They are connections with specific entities that have their own lives .
self : what are we ?
Complex. I just (2021-10-25 04:40) experienced something – while sewing – and if it is thru not just for myself but also for others then only people like deep-high shaman or deep-high spiritual explorer or doctor in fundamental physics specialty quantum physics can have an idea how truly complex and multi-faceted (dimensions) a human is.
From Conan Doyle (book : The Case) “When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth”
Layered :
- flat — shallow -w- deep -v- bottomless -||-
- personal family community calling
multi dimensional
self : self and my ancestors
I find myself this morning 2:14 AM of the twenty-sixth of october in 2021 meditating in bed. Not while writing this. I left the meditation to write this.
In that process a pain from my ancestors comes up. It is a bit vague but it seems grief over not having been with their soulmate.
self : (my ?) taste
We all have the impression our taste is our own. Impression. Do to my focusing my awareness on my body, on my self (use of mediation) I currently (2021) seem to to experience that my taste it not my own. My mastership in accurate being aware of myself is not perfect. It takes a lot of effort.
That is not what we learn in Biology how our taste works. Biology gets its perception of how the world works through examining it with physical means. The physical side of reality is real. The impression that the universe rotates around the earth is a real impression. And because we examine the universe from the earth it is relevant to take in to account what where and how the earth is in the universe.
Our perception of our self is relevant to our conditioning.
I have a taste. That includes a judgement of that taste.
What drives that taste and how do I perceive it ?
What am I and what drive me ?
What are we and what drives us ?
in progress ……
steptoharmony 